


HSWC '14 Bonus Round Fills

by rezi



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Ashen Romance | Auspistice, Being Lost, Caliginous Romance | Kismesis, Courtroom Drama, Dragon Costumes, Flushed Romance | Matesprits, Homestuck Shipping World Cup 2014, Multi, Revolution, Stranded
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-29
Updated: 2014-05-29
Packaged: 2018-01-27 02:06:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1711046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rezi/pseuds/rezi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Three bonus round fills for the Homestuck Shipping World Cup 2014.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Table of Contents

** TABLE OF CONTENTS **

_Bonus Round 1: Memories (Remember that time when...?)_  
 **Dave/Terezi [rated G]:** [Remember when Terezi helped Dave swag up his god tier clothes with more dragons?](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1711046/chapters/3643640)  
 **Feferi/Terezi [rated T]:** [Remember how legislacerator Pyrope was secretly working for the rebellion led by her girlfriend Feferi at great personal risk?](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1711046/chapters/3643667)  
 **Rose♣Gamzee♣Terezi [rated T]:** [Remember the time Rose, Gamzee and Terezi got stranded in the woods?](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1711046/chapters/3643736)


	2. Dave/Terezi [rated G]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remember when Terezi helped Dave swag up his god tier clothes with more dragons?

There's something weird and lumpy under your head when you wake up. Bringing a hand up to your hood confirms it: that sure is a weird and lumpy thing, alright. Some kind of stuffed... felt... thing? And there's another beneath it... whatever they are, they're running all down the back of your cape...

Unless your cape has been mutating or something, you'll need to take a leaf out of Terezi's book and investigate how this happened. Although you'd probably need to investigate this if your cape was mutating, because you sure don't wanna be wearing some kind of mutant felt-generating cape, unless it gives you cool mutant powers or something, you could become a superhero and you wouldn't even need to get your own superhero cape because that was what gave you the power in the first place...

... man, you ramble even when you're not actually saying anything out loud. Anyway, no matter what's going on with your cape, you should probably get up first.

You haul yourself up off the pillow pile (damn, those things are comfy) and with a dramatic patented Cool Cape Swish™ you pull off your entire Hood + Cape Combo ensemble. Yep, there's that weird and lumpy stuffed felt thing you were feeling, there on the top of the hood... now you can get a good look at it, you're pretty sure that's the melon-colored toe of Terezi's tragically murdered Detective Melontoe, sewn on awkwardly with the most lurid shade of green thread imaginable. The sewn scalemate appendages continue all the way down the hood and the back of the cape: a cherry red nose haphazardly attached here, 

All in all, the entire garment is now decorated with what could only be described as 4 M4GN1F1C3NT DR4GON SP1N3.

You have _no idea_ who could have done this.

"TEREZI!" you yell. There's a flurry of footsteps, racing towards the door. In comes the culprit, dressed as a dragon and grinning as only she can, filled with energy, excitement, dragon love and probably far too much cherryade.

"Now we can both be dragons! And only the coolest people can be dragons," she assures you, smiling all teethy at you in that somehow simultaneously terrifying and adorable way.

"Hell yes." You put the newly-dragonified costume back on and do a spin for her.

"Do you like it?" she giggles, running her hands along her handiwork.

"Hmm..." You put on your thinking face to show her that you are putting this to some serious consideration -- the level of serious consideration that only dragonifying your god tier outfit can merit. "There's just one thing missing, I guess."

She furrows up her brow, suddenly worried. "What's it missing?"

You hold up a particularly long pillow from the pile for illustration: "This beauty needs a tail."


	3. Feferi/Terezi [rated T]

It's unusual that a legislacerator argues in favour of the victim -- sorry, you mean "defendant" -- in a trial. The defendant being defended? "Absolute nonsense," you're sure the law experts who wrote all the textbooks would scoff, before motioning that you be thrown to His Tyranny alongside the victim.

But who even cares what they might think? It's not like they're here now. And really, with someone like this on trial? The choice to be made is obvious.

Sure, you're breaking every single convention there is. This is probably even more rebellious than the rebellion itself. You could get killed for this, but it's so audacious and outrageous and downright _fun_ that you've just stopped caring.

You stand from your seat, suppressing every shake and preparing to address the courtblock as boldly as you can. A glance at the defendant gives you confidence -- it's that same thrill of determination you get every time you catch her sea-salt scent, eager to outwit her and prove yourself her rightful match. Looks like you're on the same side here, though. She'll definitely have to make up for this later... perhaps by making out with you. Now that's an idea.

Grin newly spread across your face, you call out to the crowd:

"People of the court, I am here today as prosecutor for one Feferi Peixes, held on trial here on charges of the highest and foulest of treason!" All normal so far.

"I am also here to inform you that these charges are _absolute bullshit,_ and that she is to be acquitted without further ado!"

You smell a thousand eyes all looking laser sights at you. Yeah. Weren't expecting that, were they? But you can't falter here. Even a single pause might give them the opportunity to haul you off to His Tyranny's maw. On with the show...

"You will by now be aware that this poor, defenceless young lady is thought guilty of conspiring with intent against Her Imperious Condescension herself! How could this possibly be true? Look at her! Little more than a runt of a seadweller. Were it not for sheer luck, this despicable thing would have met her fuchsia-flooded demise sweeps ago!"

You can almost feel her glare piercing you through her goggles. You know she'll hate you for that later, and all the better for it.

"Let me remind you of how she was discovered at the alleged scene of the crime! The helpless, pathetic girl was mere meters away from her own hive, surrounded by hulking conspirators who could easily have snapped her in two! And you dared to assume she was conspiring with them? Why would conspirators pitting themselves against Her Condescension have any reason to consort amicably with another tyrian blood? I assert that, when the arrest was made, it in fact thwarted the conspirators' assassination attempt on the defendant!"

Yeah, you're bullshitting this. But if it sounds convincing, you're willing to roll with it. And from the confusion you hear rising from the rabble... it's working.

"Furthermore, how can we lowly-blooded serfs pass sound judgement on one of such pure blood? Every single one of us standing in the room is but a peasant compared to her royalty!" She is definitely going to tease you for that one later. You'll just have to remind her which one of you was stupid enough to get caught in the first place.

"The Empress alone deals with her heirs! Therefore, any alleged crimes committed by someone of the Empress' caste hence fall under the personal jurisdiction of the Empress herself! And, so that His Honorable Tyranny does not sadly starve another day, I propose that whichever imbecile proposed we try her here should be fed to His Tyranny instead. Such would be the rightful punishment for almost allowing such a perversion of justice to take place!"

"Now, until you have reached your decision, I shall take my leave."

That should have them squabbling for a few nights or so. Bureaucracy is a beautiful thing.

In the clamour you've caused, barely anyone notices you dragging Feferi from her seat. To the few who do, you simply dismiss it: "Interrogation!"

***

The interrogation block is in sharp contrast to the courtblock. This place is small and cramped, with a strong bulb (tasting of bright banana) flooding you both with light.

And, crucially, soundproofed.

"'Runt of a seadweller'? I'm no shrimp, I'll have you know!" You just saved her life and now she's sulking about it! But you can't help but love it when she pouts like that.

"Never mind that! Tie me up!" She's already taken your clothes for a disguise. You've cut her notably long hair to shoulder length; she almost looks like a different person. Now you're on the chair in your underwear, ready for her to follow this final command.

"Where would I get rope? I was dragged here straight from my hive! And besides, they searched my sylladex."

"They didn't search mine," you say, scratch-and-sniffing a coil of plaited kelp rope from your own sylladex victoriously. "Tie me up and gag me! How was I meant to fight? I underestimated you, you overpowered me easily!"

"But... don't you have a reputation to conchsider?" Obviously a life and death situation is the correct place for a fish pun. "Who will respect you after this?"

"Better this than you dead," you say. "Life won't be any fun without you!"

"Oh, shut up, you!" She enforces this command with a rope between the jaws. You've got to say, her tying you up half-naked has been the highlight of your night. Perhaps you'll get her to continue this later?

When her work is done, with a final glare and grin, she's gone.


	4. Rose♣Gamzee♣Terezi [rated T]

"Your motherfucking fault," Gamzee grumbles. "What idea all up and happened to make us give the blind girl the map?"

Terezi's comeback is a whack with the rolled-up map. "You were the one who kept running off! If you weren't so rowdy and rambunctious, we might actually have reached the train station by now!"

You are mere inches away from finding the nearest cliff and leaping off, facepalming all the way down. So far on this 'calm and relaxing day out', you have had to deal with bickering, vitriol, all-out war (more vicious than any in history, despite only being between two people), an attack by a swarm of birds, two minor injuries, The Great Battle Of That Hideously Muddy River, a near-drowning and at least five cases of attempted murder.

Fortunately for your continued existence -- though unfortunately for your continued suffering of these two -- there are probably no cliffs around for miles. Or houses, shops, buildings, cars, other sentient lifeforms... just tree after tree after tree.

At least the tension's mostly loosened up by now. Gamzee looks more sulky than anything. Terezi's anger is cooling off and rapidly turning to tears.

"We'll stop here for the night," you sigh. It's not quite sunset yet, but the forest canopy has stolen most of the remaining sunlight. Nothing to be gained by going on. These two would be even more uncontrollable in the dark.

"Wait, we're motherfuckin' stopping?" Gamzee glares at you, eyes wide and confused.

"No! We can't stop here! The station's so close, I swear!" She hurries to unroll the map again, stretching the thing out at arm's length and sniffing so quickly you think she might hyperventilate. Gamzee likewise scans the map, eyebrows furrowed and breath panicked.

At least you've got them to agree on something.

Snuffling her nose right up against the paper, Terezi suddenly pulls back and shouts: "THERE!"

"Yeah, you get your peep on at that!" He jabs his bony finger at the symbol on the map so hard you think he might tear it. "There's the motherfuckin' station! We don't need to stay all up and outdoors in this night!"

You have to close your eyes and take a few deep breaths, then continue: "Yes, I know the station is there. But where is here?"

Seconds pass with no sound but the cacophonous birdsong. In unison, they realise: "Oh."

No further explanation necessary. You swing the heavy rucksack off your back and unpack a huge tarpaulin, stretching it between a few trees and tying it to branches. The emergency rations follow, then the sleeping bags. "One of us will have to be keeping watch at all times. Four hours each should give us all eight hours in total. Meaning the other two should get to sleep as quickly as possible."

And before the inevitable arguing begins: "Yes, I will take first watch. Now eat your rations."

Seeing them eat feels like watching two cars collide, explode, and scatter debris over all the surrounding area. While Terezi shovels the chocolate bars into her mouth at near-lightspeed, Gamzee is chomping down on each piece with the force of a nuclear explosion. With just as much mess afterwards.

You tuck into your own chocolate, dissecting it like a patient's psyche, then tuck yourself into a sleeping bag for warmth. You've made sure to take the sleeping bag in the middle, so you can keep an eye on both of them.

"Sweet dreams, you two," you say, pulling a flashlight from the rucksack and preparing for a long night.

***

Nice how your four hours synched up with the end of this highly enjoyable romance novel. Even better: neither of them were awake to see you reading it. You dispose of the evidence quickly in the depths of the rucksack. No one will ever know.

Now, which of your two slumbering companions do you choose for the next watch?

**> GAMZEE**  
 **> TEREZI**

***

**GAMZEE**

Gamzee is a light sleeper, tossing and turning in an almost tormented fashion. His grunts and moans interrupted you many times while reading and, at times, provided an awkwardly appropriate soundtrack to some of the more _sensual_ passages. Between the movements and the noises, you're not sure if he's even asleep.

It won't do you any harm to 'wake' him, then.

Yet you don't even get the chance to try. As soon as you lean over him to do so, his eyelids pop open and stare pinpricks right at you.

Maybe it's because the lack of sleep has robbed you of the ability to make intelligent decisions. Maybe it's because your last meal consisted entirely of chocolate. But for whatever reason, you decide that this would be the time do something the sillier part of you has been aching to do for an age.

You press a finger to his nose and whisper: "Honk."

His eyes cross to look at your finger. His forehead wrinkles in surprise. And, all of a sudden, his entire body shakes as he roars with raucous laughter. You can't help but giggle as well, almost doubling 

As you both manage to calm yourselves down, you think to yourself: _well, that probably woke up every living being in the vicinity._ You look behind you: somehow, Terezi is the one and only exception. She's sleeping like a dragon atop a pile of gold in centuries-long slumber. Which is a simile she'd approve of, you think.

Leaving the dragon to her sleep and the clown to his vigil, you curl up in your own sleeping bag.

"Goodnight."

***

**TEREZI**

Terezi's snore sounds like the roar of some mythical beast. _No, not just 'some' mythical beast,_ you berate yourself. _Her snore is quite obviously the roar of a dragon._

It seems like almost a crime to wake up such a sound sleeper. A perversion of justice, you'd say. But Gamzee's thrashing about like a mad goat in his sleep; you think he needs the extra time to settle down. So with a soft shake of the arm, Terezi is the one you wake.

"Nnnnn... huh?" is her drowsy greeting to you, as she rubs her unseeing eyes.

"Your turn to watch."

"Oh. Okay." She's like a dog now, frantically shaking the wiry mess that is her hair. "I had a dream about dragons," she slurs, rising from sleep. 

"You did?" It's nice to see her so peaceful and content after the overwhelming tension of the day. You can't help but want to prolong it: "Tell me about it, then."

Her smile looks so innocent. Her voice is hushed, almost revenant, as she recounts: "I was flying! No, we were flying! All three of us on the back of a yummy vanilla dragon, and the air was blowing on all of us, and we flew through a cloud and it was all funny and wet and tingly, it tasted like cotton candy, and..." She trails off, eyes squeezed up from her grin.

"Perhaps you'll go back after your watch is over," you remark.

"I'd like that," she mutters, sounding as if she's still dreaming.

Terezi takes the flashlight from you. Gamzee seems to be settling at last. Time for you to do the same.

"Goodnight."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone could teach me how to put footnotes in so you can jump to either the Terezi or Gamzee section, I would be eternally grateful.


End file.
